Rarely am I lost for words but then something like this pops up on your travels and it leaves you just sitting there wide eyed and bemused. I always strive to find the weirdest stuff to do when I visit a place. I try and avoid the typical touristy “Top 10” lists of temples, shrines, parks and museums. In truth, they bore me to tears. I love a good suit of armour from god knows where but it doesn’t do anything for me anymore. I find myself typing: hidden gems, secrets, bizarre, crazy, weird along with other outlandish terms into search engines to see what they spit at me. However, this one was completely at random.

Shibuya is Tokyo’s busiest district with hundreds of people crossing it’s streets every minute. As the most populous city in the world it seems to have everything and I mean that without exception. Wandering down a side street away from it’s main crossing, I stumbled unto a sex shop. Now, that’s not hard to do actually. There is an abundance of sex shops, girl bars, cuddle cafes (that’s a blog for another day) and blow job bars. Funnily enough, getting blowjobs in Japan is completely legal. Who said the Japanese were conservative. Anyway, this was more like a sex superstore and when reaching the top I found an ideal watering hole to bewilder myself with.

Actually, maybe ‘watering hole’ is the wrong term to use here. I saw a large opening shaped like a large vagina in the form of a doorway and a backlit top (obviously the clitoris… probably). Trying to go in, I got a very negative response that I deciphered as “…mate, unless you’ve got a vagina or you are with one…you’re not getting in”. Fair enough to be honest. No lass wants to peruse dildos while being gawked by many single men. The curiosity was just too much, so walking down the stairs, I spied a Filipino girl looking at some very adventurous sex toys and thought, this girl will probably be open to an invite. Strolling over and awkwardly putting my hands together in a sort of “Sorry to interrupt…” kind of way, I ask would she help me get into a dildo bar upstairs.

After a few minutes convincing her I wasn’t a complete psycho and indeed arousing her own interest, we tripped lightly up the steps. I was given a much friendlier welcome this time but discovered fairly quickly that there was a hefty 2,500 Yen cover charge just to be there. Well… I didn’t come this far to turn around so through the vagina doors we went. It means I got two drinks aswell, some ‘social conversational lubricant’ to keep conversation going if things were to got a little awkward. I didn’t really need it as I’d been sake tasting earlier in the day and was sure to get my moneys worth. Hence the brazen attitude.

Holy sweet divine baby jesus in a crib…. There were millions of dildos: long, short, fat stubby, dimpled, ribbed, bent, conical, plugs, vibrating, rotating, thumping, bunny rabbit-ing and double ended variants that you might take a million years to dream up. Now, you can play with them until your hearts content and the staff will even help you out. No insertion or trials here. The fact they needed signs to explain this was evidence enough of the previous clientele who strolled through those labia for doors. I just couldn’t get over the variety and to be honest, I couldn’t figure out what half of them would even be used. Some mechanisms looked so complex and outlandish, I wouldn’t blame you for thinking you’d just fallen onto a prop set from Alien.

However, the rush of hormones, cheeky smiles and the maddening giggles of my new Filipino compadre made it a pretty cool experience. I’d recommend checking it out but do bring a friend, it’s way more fun that way but guys you do need at leastone lady with you. The price is a little high but you’re in Tokyo so you’re just going to have to accept that having fun here takes splurging a little.

Address:
Shimizu Bldg 3F,
2-7-4 Dogenzaka,
Shibuya-ku
Tokyo

Opening hours:
5pm-12 midnight / closed Sundays

Comments

comments